Posts Tagged ‘nicknames’

a fitting nickname for zack greinke

May 21, 2009

For shame, we have yet to settle on a good nickname for Zack Greinke. During the FSNKC telecast the other night they put it up for vote, but the options were atrocious. I can’t remember what they all were, but I remember they made me want to poke my eye out. Greink-i-nator. Zack Attack. Monikers that are great for your 7yr old kid, but not at all fitting a dominating force. Zack needs something intimidating. A name that can hold its weight in light of his skill level. 

May I make a suggestion?

The Don.

Ok, I admit it doesn’t rhyme. People love rhymes. I get that. And I don’t follow the popular convention of mashing a couple of words together. But this nickname isn’t about being cute. So hear me out.

If you’re not a hardcore Royals fan, you might not know that Zack’s full name isn’t Zackary (???)  Greinke. It’s Donald Zackary Greinke. Thus, the Don.

But the name goes deeper than that. It’s a shoutout to KC history. The time when gangsters and mafias ran this town. While Providence might currently be the mafia capital of the US, there was a time when a lot of bad dudes set up shop in KC.  Bad dudes who did bad things to people. Toyed with them. Messed with them. And then just cut them loose.

Look, there’s only one person right now who commands the respect of the entire city.  It certainly isn’t the Mayor. Or his wife. It’s Zack.  And cats are starting to fear the man. Alexi Ramirez still pees his pants a little bit every time he thinks about the pitch Zack let get up in near his chin. The dude is good and he know’s he’s good. He smirks every time he makes someone look foolish, and he only gets better the more the pressure builds up.

So from now on, it’s The Don.  Kiss the ring.

Go Royals